i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
