haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
babies were throwing up all over the place
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
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