Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
