Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
