He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize