its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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