What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
why is half of my head shaved?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
