U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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