um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Randomize
