Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
