i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
