OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I just forgot I was standing up.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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