I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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