im drinking this country out of the recession.
I faked an abortion last night.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize