You're so nebulous sometimes
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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