when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
