if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize