he wants to bone in the snuggie
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Someone shattered a urinal.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize