My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
You did what with his pubic hair?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
