please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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