Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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