Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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