after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Dicks are not precious.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize