using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize