omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
