what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
