I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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