Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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