i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
