I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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