I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize