Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
