If i come over, it means nothing
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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