Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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