It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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