Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
