I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize