listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
