I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
