Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
