his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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