i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
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