I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
