Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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