There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
