He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
