THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
My Sexting was not on an AP level
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
