We won't sleep together?
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
