what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
