Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Randomize
