I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
