So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
